Friday, October 2, 2009
recommendations on New NAME of BLOG
I know the bloggers for this blog are in endangered and going to extinct...
But If you come and visit this blog then please change itzz name as ex-XII A of KV vikaspuri coz itzz no more XI A....
Have A Good Day Sir.....
What You Are Doing????????????????
I M repeating this year in aakash 4 jee 2010...
n hopes 4 ur best wishes..................
Monday, April 20, 2009
I I T
.........ha ! ha ! ha ! just JOKING!
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Beauty Secrets
speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes,
seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure,
share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair,
let a child run his fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge
you never walk alone.
We leave you a tradition of the future.
The tender loving care of human beings
will never become obsolete.
People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, redeemed and redeemed and redeemed.
Never throw anyone away.
Remember, if you ever need a helping hand,
you'll find one at the end of your arm.
As you grow older, you'll discover that you have two hands - one for helping yourself,
the second for helping others.
You've great days still ahead of you.
May there be many of them.
Monday, March 31, 2008
Saturday, February 23, 2008
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
Sunday, January 20, 2008
Six ways to make people like you!!!!!!..
A simple way to make a good impression. The expression one wears on one's face if far more important than the clothes one wears on one's back. Actions speak louder than words, and a smile says, " I like you. You make me happy. I am glad to see you." You must have a good time meeting people i f you expect them to have a good time meeting you. You don't feel like smiling? Then what? Two things. First, force yourself to smile. If you are alone, force yourself to whistle or hum a tune or sing. Act as if you were already happy, and that will tend to make you happy. "Action seems to follow feeling, but really action and feeling go together; and by regulating the action, which is under the more direct control of the will, we can indirectly regulate the feeling, which is not." -William James. Happiness doesn't depend on outward conditions. It depends on inner conditions. It isn't what you have or who you are or where you are or what you are doing that makes you happy or unhappy. It is what you think about it. "There is nothing either good or bad," said Shakespeare, "but thinking makes it so." Your smile is a messenger of your good will. Your smile brightens the lives of all who see it. To someone who has seen a dozen people frown, scowl or turn their faces away, your smile is like the sun breaking through the clouds.
Principle 2: Smile.
If you don't do this, you are headed for trouble The average person is more interested in his or her own name than all the other names on earth put together. Remember that name and call it easily, and you have paid a subtle and very effective compliment. But forget it or misspell it-and you have plac e yourself at a sharp disadvantage. Whenever you meet a new acquaintance, find out his or her complete name and some facts about his or her family, business or political opinions. Fix all these facts well in mind as part of the picture, and the next time you meet that person, even if it was a year later, you will be able to shake hands, inquire after the family, and ask about the hollyhocks in the backyard. Sometimes it is difficult to remember a name, particularly if it is hard to pronounce. Rather than even try to learn it, many people ignore it or call the person by an easy nickname. Most people don't remember names, for the simple reason that they don't take the time and energy necessary to concentrate and repeat and fix names indelibly in their minds. If you don't hear the name distinctly say excuse me I didn't get your name clearly. Then, if it is an unusual name, ask how it is spelled. Use the person's name several times in the conversation; try to associate it in your mind with the person's featur es, expression and general appearance. Then, when you are alone write the name down on a piece of paper, look at it, and concentrate on it, fix it securely in your mind, in this way you will gain an eye impression of the name as well as an ear impression.
Principle 3: Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
An easy way to become a good conversationalist Listen intently; listen because you are genuinely interested. That kind of listening is one of the highest compliments we can pay anyone. The chronic kicker, even the most violent critic, will frequently soften and be subdued in the presence of a patient, sympathetic listener-a listener who will be silent with the irate fault-finger dilates like a king cobra and spews the poison out of his system. Be more eager to hear what a person has to say then even they are to tell it. Many people prefer good list eners to good talkers, but the ability to listen seems rarer than almost any other good trait. All we want when we are in trouble is a friendly, sympathetic listener to unburden yourself. That is frequently all the irritated customer wants, and the dissat isfied employee or the hurt friend. If you want to know how to make people shun you and laugh at you behind your back and even despise you, here is the recipe: Never listen to anyone for long. Talk incessantly about yourself. If you have an idea while the other person is talking, don't wait for him or her to finish: bust right in and interrupt in the middle of a sentence. If you aspire to be a good conversationalist, be an attentive listener. To be interesting, be interested. Ask questions that other persons will enjoy answering. Encourage them to talk about themselves and their accomplishments.
Principle 4: Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
How to interest people The royal road to a person's heart is to talk about the things he or she treasures most. Make an effort to find out what interests the person then get them talking about it. Talking in terms of the other person's interests pays off for both parties. When asked what reward he got from it, Mr. Herzig responded that he not only received a different reward from each person but that in general the reward had been an enlargement of his life each time he spoke to someone.
Principle 5: Talk in terms of the other person's interests.
How to make people like you instantly. Ask yourself " What is there about him or her that I can honestly admire?" That is sometimes a hard question to answer, especially with strangers. You want approval of those with whom you come in contact. You want recognition of your true worth. You want a feeling that your are important in our little world. You don't want to listen to cheap, insincere flattery, but you do crave sincere appreciation. So let's obey the Golden Rule, and give unto others what we would have others give unto us. How? When? Where? The answer is all the time, everywhere. Use little phrases such as "I'm sorry to trouble you, ___." "Would you please ___?" "Won't you please?" "Would you mind?" "Thank you." The unvarnished truth is that almost all the people you meet feel themselves superior to you in some way, and a sure way to their hearts is to let them realize in some subtle way that you recognize their importance, and recognize it sincerely. Talk to people about themselves and they will listen for hours.
Principle 6: Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely.
In a Nutshell: Six ways to make people like you Become genuinely interested in other people. Smile. Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves. Talk in terms of the other person's interests. Make the other person feel important-and do it sincerely .
Monday, January 14, 2008
KIRSTEN'S VIEWS
Nagraj Gollapudi in Perth
January 13, 2008
|
| |
Gary Kirsten believes the "spirit of cricket was breached" during the controversial Sydney Test, and feels both the captains need to sit together and resolve the issue.
"I'm not sitting on the fence. The game doesn't need two nations saying 'I was right'," Kirsten, who joined the Indian team as a consultant in Perth, told Cricinfo.
Refusing to take sides, Kirsten, set to become India's head coach from March 1, said there couldn't be smoke without fire from either side. "One needs to be a careful. I have got to look at this thing objectively. I have got to be very careful in what I say. To me what's going on is sad.
"I'm looking at it objectively because I wasn't in the heat of the battle. Maybe I'd have a different perspective if I was in the heat of battle saying India were unfairly treated, and there were comments made, but the way it's going is not good for the game at the moment."
Kirsten felt it was up to the players to find the best way to resolve the issue. "I read that Ricky Ponting and Anil Kumble are meeting up and that is very good. They need to sit down with the players and tell them, 'Listen, we are the custodians of the game at the moment and we've got to make sure we uphold this game and the passion with it should be played'."
He wanted both teams to take a fresh approach to the way they go about playing in the remainder of the series. "No individual is greater than the game. These are two great cricket nations and as players, they need to stand up and say, 'This is the way we are going to go about our business now'. I don't think for one minute that takes away the aggressiveness and competitiveness with which you should play the game. I think there has been an overstepping of the mark and once players breach that anything can happen."
BRAIN
FEELINGS
feelings
Feelings convey information about situations, on both conscious and subconscious levels, via at least 30 neurochemicals acting alone or in concert in complex ways.
The feeling of fear, for example, is an anticipation of injury, broadly defined. It raises the levels of brain chemicals such as adrenalin and cortisol. In healthy subjects, fear is triggered by stimuli that indicate the presence of risk or direct danger. However, even in the absence of a direct threat, thoughts (the active comparing and contrasting of data), unconscious brain patterns, and imaginings can also promote fearful responses. Fear can therefore be deliberately induced, as occurs regularly in both the political and entertainment realms.
Perception of the physical world does not necessarily result in a universal reaction among receivers (see emotions), but varies depending on one’s tendency to handle the situation, how the situation relates to the receiver's past experiences, and any number of other factors (see further http://www.feelingdictionary.com).
Thoughts and feelings often coexist. A thought can be viewed as a comparing or contrasting of data items while a feeling is a visceral perception of the difference between the items. When a belief is attached to the cause of, or reason for the difference, the perception takes on a specifically labelled quality assigned by experience and called an emotion.
Harvard professor Abraham Maslow suggested that human beings are all born with an innate sense of positive and negative being-values. We are attracted to positive being-values such as justice,honesty, truth,beauty, humour, liveliness, power (but not abusive power), order (but not nit-picking), intelligence. Likewise, we are repulsed by injustice, death, ugliness, weakness, falseness, deceit, chaos, etc.
Maslow asserted that positive being-values are only definable in terms of all other positive being-values—in other words, we cannot maximize any virtue and let it contain some negative being-values without repulsion. For example, beauty that is associated with deceit becomes repulsive. Justice associated with cruelty is repulsive.
This innate capacity to feel attraction or repulsion forms part of the foundation for moral conscience—that is, feelings, perceived, help shape the individual's moral judgements.
The List is different from tradition to tradition. Tibetan Buddhism has a different list. It also needs to be understood that language also plays an important part in culturally defining feeling and different cultures have different way of perceiving and identifying feelings. some feelings in the list may not exist at all in a particular cultural-linguistic context.
[edit] Translations
Hebrew: רגשּׁ (feeling), נגע (touch)
[edit] Gut feeling
A gut feeling or gut reaction is a visceral emotional reaction to something, often one of disgust. Gut feelings are generally regarded as unmodulated by conscious thought.
"Gut feeling" may also be used as a short-hand term for an individual's "common sense" perception of what is morally right.
Gut feelings, like all reflexive unconscious comparisons can be re-programmed by practice or experiencesEMOTIONS
emotions
Definition of emotion
Although a common word, it is not easy to come up with a generally acceptable definition of emotion. Growing consensus does agree that the distinction between emotion and feeling is important. According to Damasio, feeling can be viewed as the subjective experience of an emotion that arises physiologically in the brain. [1]
Many psychologists adopt the ABC model, which defines emotions in terms of three fundamental attributes: A. physiological arousal, B. behavioral expression (e.g. facial expressions), and C. conscious experience, the subjective feeling of an emotion. All three attributes are necessary for a full fledged emotional event, though the intensity of each may vary greatly.
Robert Masters makes the following distinctions between affect, feeling and emotion: "As I define them, affect is an innately structured, non-cognitive evaluative sensation that may or may not register in consciousness; feeling is affect made conscious, possessing an evaluative capacity that is not only physiologically based, but that is often also psychologically (and sometimes relationally) oriented; and emotion is psychosocially constructed, dramatized feeling."[2]
Emotion is sometimes regarded as the antithesis of reason. This distinction stems from Western philosophy and is reflected in common phrases like appeal to emotion or your emotions have taken over. Emotions can be undesired to the individual experiencing them; he or she may wish to control but often cannot. Thus one of the most distinctive, and perhaps challenging, facts about human beings is this potential for entanglement, or even opposition, between will, emotion, and reason.
In Paul MacLean's classic Triune brain model, emotions are defined as the responses of the Mammalian cortex. Emotion competes with even more instinctive responses from the Reptilian cortex and the more logical, reasoning neocortex. However, current research on the neural circuitry of emotion suggests that emotion is an essential part of human decision-making and planning, and that the famous distinction made by Descartes between reason and emotion is not as clear as it seems.[3]
Emotion is complex, and the term has no single universally accepted definition.[4] Emotions create a response in the mind that arises spontaneously, rather than through conscious effort. It is unclear whether animals or all human beings experience emotion. Emotions are physical expressions, often involuntary, related to feelings, perceptions or beliefs about elements, objects or relations between them, in reality or in the imagination. The study of emotions is part of psychology, neuroscience, and, more recently, artificial intelligence. According to Sloman,[5] emotions are cognitive processes. Some authors emphasize the difference between human emotions and the affective behavior of animals.
Emotion as the subject of scientific research has multiple dimensions: behavioral, physiological, subjective, and cognitive. Sloman argues that many emotions are side-effects of the operations of complex mechanisms (e.g. 'alarm' mechanisms) required in animals or machines with multiple motives and limited capacities and resources for coping with a changing and unpredictable world, just as 'thrashing' can sometimes occur as a side-effect of scheduling and memory management mechanisms required in a computer operating system for purposes other than producing thrashing. Such side effects are sometimes useful sometimes dysfunctional. Other theorists, often influenced by writings of Antonio Damasio argue that emotions themselves are necessary for any intelligent system (natural or artificial).
Some state that there is no empirical support for any generalization suggesting the antithesis between reason and emotion: indeed, anger or fear can often be thought of as a systematic response to observed facts. In any case, it is clear that the relation between logic and argument and emotion is one which merits careful study.
Psychiatrist William Glasser's theory of the human control system states that behavior is composed of four simultaneous components: deeds, ideas, emotions, and physiological states. He asserts that we choose the idea and deed and that the associated emotions and physiological states also occur but cannot be chosen independently. He calls his construct a total behavior to distinguish it from the common concept of behavior. He uses the verbs to describe what is commonly seen as emotion. For example, he uses 'to depress' to describe the total behavior commonly known as depression which, to him, includes depressing ideas, actions, emotions, and physiological states. Dr. Glasser also further asserts that internal choices (conscious or unconscious) cause emotions instead of external stimuli.
Many people find it hard to express emotion. Some emotions may include; happiness, sadness, jealousy, excitedness and many others. A disease commonly known as depression is a type of illness associated with emotional disregulation. Depression is extremely prevalent but its cause it still largely unknown. Treatments therefore vary, with people relying on anti-depressants, therapy, and herbal and alternative medicines.
blood
Blood is a fluid tissue containing many suspended cells and can be found flowing through the circulatory system transporting substances. These substances may include the digested food substances like amino acids and glucose, excretory products of the body, heat from the respiring body organs and tissues and oxygen and carbon dioxide for respiration. Apart from the transportation of substances, blood also serves to protect the body against pathogens. Pathogens are disease-causing organisms able to inflict disease against the body.
In this section you will learn the composition of our blood, its disorders and how it can transport essentials as well as waste products through our body's vessels
Sunday, January 13, 2008
Sunday, January 6, 2008
not my late lateefee
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2008
Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Here's how to get rid of pimples/acne quickly and safely:
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2. Every 30 minutes, apply an ice pack to the pimple and hold it there for about 2 minutes. This will decrease the swelling and redness and help shrink the inflammation and pain that sometimes comes along with it.
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3. They don't call it concealer for nothing! Covering the pimple with a light dose of flesh-tinted concealer can help mask it when you're in a hurry. It also helps cover up that oily shine.
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4. Cleanse your skin 2-3 times a day with mild, unscented soap or a specialized acne cleanser that has no harsh chemicals (such as lye). Scrub skin gently with an exfoliating pad or washcloth, but don't rub too hard, otherwise you'll sap your skin of its own natural oils, which help to repel buildup naturally.
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5. Apply a cream or ointment containing benzyl peroxide or salicylic acid (many over-the-counter acne medicines contain these ingredients) to the blemish or around the entire facial area. Note that these ingredients both have a tendency to dry out skin if used too much and are not recommended if you have sensitive skin.
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6. Wear oil-free makeup whenever possible. These types have less of a tendency to cause the pore buildup that results in blemishes. Remove your makeup nightly and cleanse with an acne-fighting medicine to remove dirt, oil and makeup from deep within the skin.
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7. If you're in need of a quick fix, a dab of toothpaste on the affected area right before bed can help soothe irritation and reduce redness. Pressing and holding a wet tea bag or a cotton ball with a dab of lemon juice against the blemish for five minutes can also reduce swelling and redness.
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FROM ,
SUNNY KAUSHIK,
(SKIN SPECIALIST)
Monday, December 31, 2007
just a start
Saturday, December 29, 2007
A VERY HAPPY NEW YEART TO ALL
but let me remind you...
kyunki KABIR ne kaha hai "KAL KARE SO AAJ KAR ,AAJ KARE SO AB ,PAL MEIN BLOG BHAR JAYEGA WISH KAREGA KAB???????????????????.........
"A DEEP NEW YEAR WISHES TO ALL VISITOR"
HAPPY NEW YEAR
Angelina Jolie
Aishwarya Rai
Arnold
JenniferLopez
Amitabh Bachhan
& me..
All the Stars wish u a Very Happy New Year.
Friday, December 21, 2007
Monday, December 17, 2007
admissions to nursery classes..!!
here comes the time to prepare urself for the upcoming IIT entrance exam to b into the engineering world...
at the same time some of the parents are preparing themselves to admit their young guns to the nursery classes..
what kind of admissions procedure is this where instead of checking the skills and talent of the budding child, schools are looking for the educational backgrounds of the parents.
instead the parents who are not enough educated should be given more preference to get their child educated from a good institution.
looking you people to ponder your thoughts over the posted topic.
If you are honest this tells the truth - it's pretty good
Write your answers on a piece of paper.
No cheating !!
The answers are at the bottom of this page.
1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?
3. Your first initial?
4. Your month of birth?
5. Which color do you like more, black or white?
6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
7. Your favorite number?
8. Do you like Sydney or Brisbane more?
9. Do you like a lake or the ocean more?
10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).
When you're done, scroll down. (Don't cheat)
Answers**************************************************************************************************************************************************************************1.
1. You are completely in love with this person.
2. If you choose:Red - You are alert and your life is full of love.
Black - you are conservative and aggressive.
Green - your soul is relaxed and you are laid back
Blue - you are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the onesyou love.
Yellow- you are a very happy person and give good advice to thosewho are down.
3. If your initial is: A-K You have a lot of love to give in friendships in your life.
L-R You try to enjoy your life to the maximum and your love life is soon toblossom.
S-Z You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in: Jan-Mar: The year will go very well for you and youwill discover that you fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
April-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will last long and the memories will last forever.
July-Sep: You will have a great year and will experience a majorlife-changing experience for the good.
Oct-Dec: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your soul mate.
5. If you chose..... Black: Your life will take on a different direction, itwill be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do anything for you, but you may not realize it.
]6. This person is your best friend.
7. This is how many close friends you have in your lifetime.
8. If you chose: Sydney: You like adventure. Brisbane: You are a laid back person.
9. If you chose:Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your lover and are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.
10. This wish will come true only if you send this to five people in onehour.
Sunday, December 16, 2007
Saturday, December 15, 2007
riddles
What can run but never walks, has a mouth but never talks, has a head but never weeps, has a bed but never sleeps?
river
My thunder comes before the lightning; My lightning comes before the clouds; My rain dries all the land it touches. What am I?
A volcano.
I have hands that wave at you, Though I never say goodbye. It's cool for you to be with me, Especially when I say, "HI." What am I?
An electric fan.
Friday, December 14, 2007
Monday, December 10, 2007
sardar jokes
sardar : Punjab.
Boss : which part ?
sardar : Kya which part ? Whole body born in punjab.
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1 : What would you do if the bomb explodes while fixing.
sardar 2 : Dont worry, I have a one more.
Sardar : What is the name of your car ?
Lady : I forgot the name, but is starts with "T".
Sardar : Oye Kamaal ki gaadi hai, Tea se start hoti hai.
Hamaara gaadi petrol se start hoti hai.
Sardar was busy removing a wheel from his auto.
A man asks sardar whyare you removing a wheel from your auto.
sardar : Cant you read the board.
Parking is only for 2 wheeler.
Sardar got into a bus on 1st April when conductor asked for ticket.
HegaveRs.10/- and took the ticket and said April fool.
I have pass.
Sardar joined new job.
1st day he worked till late evening on thecomputer.
Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar : Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.
On a romantic day sardar's girlfriend asks him.
Darling on ourengagement day will you give me a ring.
Sardar : Ya sure, from landline or mobile.
Doctor to patient : You will die within 2 hours.
Do you want to see any one before you die?
Patient : Yes. A good doctor.
How will you destroy a submarine full of sardars ?
Simple. Just knock the door and they will open it....
Santa apni girl friend ko I Luv U kehta hai aur gir jata hai.
Gal: Yeh kya kar rahe ho?
Santa: I'm falling in love.
Santa: Today is Sunday & I wanna njoy, so I bought 3 movie tickets
Jeeto: Why 3?
Santa: For you and your parents
Museum Administrator: That's a 500-year-old statue u've broken.
Banta: Thanks God! I thought it was a new one.
A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.
At the scene of an accident a man was crying:
O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Santa: Control yourself.
Don't cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?
In an interview,Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. ....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...
Santa was getting bitten by mosquitoes the whole night
. He got irritated...drank poison & said,Ab kaato saalon, sab maroge!
Banta: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Banta: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says This is all India Radio!
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Santa: Tipu's skeleton.
Tourist: Whose that smaller skeleton next to it?
Santa: That was Tipu's skeleton when he was child
***************************************************************************************************************************
jokes
Boy:What?
Girl: I really like you. And I... I think I'm falling in lovewith you.
Boy: Ok
...Girl: What do you mean "ok"?
Boy: I don't like you like that...
Girl: Why not?
Boy: I can't tell you... maybe another time...
From then on, the girl kept asking the boy "Why not?"
whenever she saw him,and he kept answering the same answer of "I'll tell youlater."
Finally the girl got fed up
.Girl: I'm tired of this! Tell me why you don't likeme!
Boy: Do you really wanna know why?
Girl: Yes!Boy: It's because you're ugly!
What's the point ofgoing out with someone when they're not pretty?!
Girl: But... I...
Boy: Just shut up and leave me alone!
The boy leaves andthe girl is sitting there alone, crying her heart out.Then her cell phone rings.
Girl: Hello?
Mom: Sweetheart?
I want you to go home, ok? I'll be home fromwork in a few hours.
Girl: Alright Mom.
Mom: I love you.
Girl: I love you too, Mom.
Mom: Bye Bye.
Girl: ByeThe girl heads home and once she got there,
she went in thebathroom and looked at herself in the mirror.
Girl: I'm not pretty enough...
She set to work, knowing fully well what she was going to do.2 hours later, her Mom came home and heard the bath water running.
She wentupstairs tofind the hallway flooded so she knocked on the door.Mom: Honey? Are you alright?
She opened the door and was shocked at the site.T
he bath was overflowingonto the floor, and the water was tinted red.
She walked overto seewhat was inside and screamed.
There, her little girl was lyingwith cuts all over her face and wrists.
Her Mom backed away and was going to runto call the police
when something caught her eye. On the mirror, am I pretty enoughnow?
No one deserves to be told that by someone they love.
If youfind it messedup then forward this to everyone you know.A person's appearance doesn't count. What counts is theirheart inside of them and their personality.
Saturday, November 24, 2007
सबसे पकाऊ जोक
अगर कीसी को समझ में आये तो मुझे समझाना
I went to the cinema the other day and in the front row was an old man and with him was his dog. It was a sad funny kind of film, you know the type. In the sad part, the dog cried his eyes out, and in the funny part, the dog laughed its head off. This happened all the way through the film. After the film had ended, I decided to go and speak to the man.
"That's the most amazing thing I've seen," I said. "That dog really seemed to enjoy the film."
The man turned to me and said, "Yeah, it is. He hated the book."
get a silly chicken
Question and answer animal jokes
A: To show the armadillo that it was possible.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get away from Colonel Sanders!
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road twice?
A: Because it was a double-crosser.
Q: Why did the Iraqi chicken cross the road?
A: To take over the other side.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the playground?
A: To get to the other slide.
Q: Why did the chicken cross the beach?
A: To get to the other tide.
Q: Why did the dinosaur cross the road?
A: Chickens hadn't evolved yet.
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Sunday, November 18, 2007
LAUGHTER IS AN INSTANT VACATION
Boyfriend: Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again yesterday
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Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?
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Manager: Sorry, but I can't give you a job. I don't need much help.
Job Applicant: That's all right. In fact I'm just the right person in this case. You will see, I won't be of much help anyway!!
************ ***
Dad: Son, what do you want for your birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
************ ***
Diner: I can't eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
************ ***
Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?
************ ***
Husband: You know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did , I still got mine with me!
************ ***
Man: Officer! There's a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don't worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can keep it.
************ ***
Father: Your teacher says she finds it Impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That's why I say she's no good!
************ ***
regards,
mayur
BEAUTY SECRETS
speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes,
seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure,
share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair,
let a child run his fingers through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge
you never walk alone.
We leave you a tradition of the future.
The tender loving care of human beings
will never become obsolete.
People, even more than things, have to be restored, renewed, revived, reclaimed, redeemed and redeemed and redeemed.
Never throw anyone away.
Remember, if you ever need a helping hand,
you'll find one at the end of your arm.
As you grow older, you'll discover that you have two hands - one for helping yourself,
the second for helping others.
You've great days still ahead of you.
May there be many of them.